Christmas Confessional

I’m pretty sure we have way too many Christmas ornaments for the rinky-dink tree we currently own. Not to mention for the 2.5 small children we have. This year, David knocked the tree over just once … but he’s still pretty small. Next year he’ll have a mini-helper!

We took it down tonight, which seems very early to me. It’s not that I am super eager for Christmas to be over. But I’ve felt all my inadequacies jumping out of the furniture at me this December. I’m ready for a little bit of normalcy again. Not to mention the space in the living room!

Here’s my Christmas confession: we only did about 7 days of Truth in the Tinsel. I was admittedly unprepared, but we could have made it work with the craft supplies we had. I just did not feel like I could make the effort most days to coerce my whiny 4-year-old into listening to a Bible story. She likes the crafts, but without the story, what is it?

We also didn’t make Christmas cookies, we didn’t eat the candy in our Advent calendar every day, and we watched entirely too many Christmas movies.

I forget about what pregnancy does to my body until I find myself there again. I really feel like I turn into a grumpy octogenarian for nine months, and birth is the only cure. The year I was pregnant with David, I think I gave myself more grace since Libbie was still very young and I was 9 months pregnant, not 6.

I found myself a big mess of disappointment last week about how our December had progressed. I called my mom and sobbed. She talked me off the cliff, but in my heart I still felt hollow. I want my children to know the magical Christmases my parents created. When I am pregnant, it’s just not going to happen for us.

But you know what we did do?

Cuddled and watched The Polar Express until 9 p.m. Made salt dough ornaments. Read a Christmas book every night that the kids got to unwrap, and they loved that. Talked about baby Jesus and Mary and shepherds and wise men. Decorated the tree together, and undecorated it together too.

The only thing that’s going to keep my kids from thinking this was a great couple of weeks is me.

Making Christmas Memories …

Sometimes I wonder if I’m trying too hard to create memories that my children will be too young to remember. Does that sound silly?

Saturday night, I thought it would be fun to take them to look at Christmas lights. I looked up some places online and found at least one location where there was supposed to be a house with lights and music. I asked Mr. V if he’d take us out to dinner first, and we promised Libbie that if she took a nap she could stay up and watch a movie on TV.

We had just strapped David into the high chair at the little Chinese restaurant when he started screaming bloody murder for “SOMETHING EAT MOMMY PLEASE” and wriggling relentlessly. So Mr. V quickly decided on dinner and left with David to walk around a store next door rather than make the small Saturday night crew of kung pao-eaters listen to his wails.

The kids ate minuscule amounts of lo mein, I forced down some just-OK pork while blowing my nose and trying to pretend this cold wasn’t getting worse.

We got back in the car after wrestling David a little more and telling Libbie if she didn’t stop crawling under the table we would make her eat a mushroom. (Somehow I don’t think threatening with vegetables is probably a good parenting method.) I said something to the note of “we are going to have fun whether you like it or not,” which may or may not have influenced David’s cries of, “WHEE! SO FUN!” and choruses of “Happy Birthday to Mommy” while we drove.

Ronald McDonald House Lights
source: fredthechicken

One unsure turn and some dark roads later, we found the neighborhood we sought … and some gently-lit houses and lanterns. No gaudy lights. No music. We drove around a little more, and the kids were truly happy to see blow-up snowmen and blue lights on houses. We didn’t find anything extravagant, but it was OK.

We drove the 25 minutes home, and David’s “whee” had become fussing and fighting with his sister. We put him to bed, and Libbie did get to stay up and watching Despicable Me with Mommy and Daddy, munching on pretzels and cuddling. She loves those movie nights.

But it all caused me to question, am I trying too hard? Do I remember anything from being 4? I certainly want to make a warm, loving home and establish some Christmas traditions … but maybe it’s too early. Maybe dinners out and long drives are for older kids.

Or maybe I just spend way too much time in introspection.

What do you think?

Saturday Linky Love 12/1/12

Welcome back to the links, y’all! Did you have a good Thanksgiving? While it felt like a LONG time in the car with the kids, we enjoyed our first roadtrip in the new-to-us mini-van and seeing relatives in Ohio.

I can’t believe December starts tomorrow! I feel really unprepared to do Truth in the Tinsel this year. I may have to fudge along the first three days until I can shop for craft supplies without the kids on Tuesday! Are you doing it or another Advent activity?

(And since when I asked Libbie what Christmas was really about tonight and she said “presents,” I think we better get on with the Advent! Yikes.)

Here are some fun, important, or yummy things I’ve read the past few weeks.

So, what did you read that was great this week? Link up here. You can grab the code for the button in the sidebar, if you want. Please link back to Vanderbilt Wife and add the PERMALINK to your post, not your home page.

A Self-Righteous Christmas?

You know when you see something on Twitter and worry it’s directed to you? I think it’s quite possible a friend’s Tweet was. It was about getting self-righteous about our choices at Christmas. And it made me think long and hard.

Last night I wrote this post on ParentLife. I knew what I wanted to talk about: giving charitable gifts during Christmas. But obviously I wasn’t sure how to get there. It didn’t feel right as I was composing the post, but I let it publish anyway.

And now I feel kind of awful.

No, we don’t do Santa. We don’t buy a lot of expensive presents. But do I care if you do? Not really.

Here is what I know about myself: it is VERY easy for me to get wrapped up in materialism. My love language is gifts. Add to that my firstborn, semi-perfectionist, people-pleaser history and you can probably see that I can get obsessive about buying gifts for others. IT HAS TO BE PERFECT. IT HAS TO BE JUST THE RIGHT AMOUNT, SHOW LOVE, AND MAKE THE PERSON HAPPY FOR THE REST OF HIS OR HER LIFE.

Yes, I realize that might sound goofy to most of you. But it’s the reason I’ve really had to step back at Christmas. Is that the attitude I want my kids to have? My only desire is that they will truly be able to separate Jesus Christmas from “Santa Christmas,” that to them Christmas will be more about giving and loving and knowing Christ than it is about perfectionism and cookies and – most of all – what toys they circled in the Toys R Us catalog.

baby jesus
source: davidking

As with most things, it’s an area where we can be driven by guilt. My biggest struggle during Christmas is worrying how others perceive our minimalist attitude. I’m pretty sure some days that my parents think we are Evil Incarnate for depriving our kids of Santa. Whenever someone asks Libbie what Santa is bringing her for Christmas I want to cry when she answers, “Santa doesn’t come to our house.” I’m embarrassed.

It’s easier to put up a defense of self-righteousness, isn’t it? To Facebook about my hatred for Elf on the Shelf and make a big deal of only reading Jesus-y Christmas books? (By the way, the first book we opened? It’s Christmas, David, which is jam-packed with Santa and sillyness.)

I think this is what I want to say: whatever you choices are – about Christmas, about parenting, whatever – don’t let them be driven by guilt or what others think. I don’t want to buy a bunch of gifts for my kids and I try not to let 8 million commercials and gift guides and peer pressure influence that decision. With everything, I want my decisions to be influenced only by God’s desires for me and my family. I am only held responsible for my children – not yours.

So this Christmas … make your decisions. But may they be driven by a desire to please God and not played out in a self-righteous fashion. I promise I’ll do my part to do the same. I hope talking about how we “do Christmas” around here will never make you feel guilty, accused, or angry.

 

25 Jesus-Centered Christmas Books to Celebrate Advent


I love the idea I’ve seen again and again on Pinterest for wrapping 25 Christmas books up and letting your kids open one as part of each day of Advent. We’ll be doing Truth in the Tinsel again this year, and reading a book together seems like a good waiting-for-glue-to-dry activity, doesn’t it?

But here’s the thing—and think we’re evil if you want—but we don’t do Santa. I am certainly not anti-Santa by any means, but we’ve chosen to focus on Jesus as the reason for Christmas, not Santa bringing gifts. Mommy and Daddy bring the gifts in our family. (OK, truthfully, Grandma, Grandpa, Nana, and Popi bring most of the gifts.)

So I’ve been trying to come up with 25 books sans Santa that we could use for this activity. And maybe you have, too? Here are my suggestions – please leave yours in the comments!

God Gave Us Christmas by Lisa Tawn Bergren – No, I don’t like God Gave Us You. But I do like this one more. And I hadn’t put together until right now that this is the same author who wrote Waterfall, which I just read this week and LOVED!

The Perfect Christmas Gift (Gigi, God’s Little Princess Series) by Sheila Walsh – I believe I’ve expounded on my great love for the Gigi books. They are funny for kids and adults and teach little girls great lessons about being a daughter of the Highest King.

The Pine Tree Parable by Liz Curtis Higgs – “It’s one of those Christmas books that isn’t technically about baby Jesus and the manger but still manages to get the entire real true story of Christmas in there without being trite or cheesy. I cry every single time I read it!” – OhAmanda

The Very First Christmas (Beginner’s Bible) – I believe this is just the Christmas story excerpted from The Beginner’s Bible; but since we don’t have that Bible, I like this one. It’s divided into tiny chapters and includes everything from the angel visiting Mary to the flight to Egypt. It also has a short chapter about Jesus growing up and what He did on the cross. [Plus, this is only $1.99 at ChristianBook.com and even less if you buy in bulk, making it perfect for handing out to Sunday School classes.]

The First Christmas by Gaby Goldsack – Your basic Christmas story retelling, with sweet illustrations by Caroline Pedler.

Lift-the-Flap Nativity from Reader’s Digest – This one is great for my smaller guy (he’ll be 2 the week of Christmas). He LOVES flaps. Fun and interactive!

The Candle in the Window by Grace Johnson – This one is long—I would never expect David to sit through it. But it’s a beautiful story of a German cobbler who remembers the true meaning of Christmas as Christmas Eve passes. Based on a story by Leo Tolstoy. The illustrations by Mark Elliott are lovely and enchanting as well.

Song of the Stars by Sally Lloyd-Jones – “This is a children’s book, but I was totally captivated by this story. Each page shows and tells about different aspects of our world – the wind, the trees, the animals, the stars – as they whisper to each other, ‘It’s time! It’s time!’ The anticipation builds until at last Jesus arrives and creation celebrates the Light of the World and the Prince of Peace.” – The Christian Manifesto

Humphrey’s First Christmas by Carol Heyer – I’ve been captivated by this book ever since I saw its cover. Isn’t Humphey a hoot? He’s one of the camels who carries the Wise Men, and this is his story. I finally ordered it today!

 

The Legend of the Candy Cane by Lori Walburg – A stranger comes to a small town and introduces them to legend behind the candy cane, with help from a little girl named Lucy.

Room for a Little Oneby Martin Waddell – On Christmas Eve / all are welcome / at the stable. / On Christmas Eve / all are welcome / because there’s always / room for a little one.

The King’s Christmas List by Eldon Johnson – This is based on the same passage and ideas as The Candle in the Window, so it would be good to introduce a week later or so and reiterate what you learned there.

The Wonder of Christmas by Dandi Daley Mackall – We love Miss Mackall in our house. I love how this one prompts your children to think about how each character in the Nativity might have been thinking then.

Josie’s Gift by Kathleen Bostrom – This is one of my absolute favorite Christmas books; and I think Libbie will be old enough to really sit through it this year (she’s 4). More than anything, Josie wants a beautiful blue sweater. But it’s the Depression and her father died that year. Is Christmas about what you want … or what you have?

On This Special Night by Claire Freedman – Although Jesus’ name is never mentioned, children with any context of the Christmas story will “get” it as they see the animals gather for a very special night. This one is all about the illustrations.

Merry Creature Christmas by Dandi Daley Mackall – Another Mackall treasure. “Little Star, Big Bear, and the proud, white mare, Join the forest creatures dancing everywhere. All the bluebirds sing, praising Christ the King, On the night of the Creature Christmas.”

The Best Thing about Christmas by Christine Harder Tangvald – A little simplistic, but a good choice, especially for smaller children.

The Crippled Lamb by Max Lucado – Joshua the lamb can’t keep up with the other sheep and feels left out … but finds himself in a special stable.

The Tiny Star by Art Ginolfi – A little board book, where a tiny star plays a big role.

The Tale of the Three Trees by Angela Hunt – Based on the folktale, Angela Hunt retells the story of three trees who think they dream to be certain things … and find themselves in even more important roles. Not strictly a Christmas book, but I think it’s good to relate the whole story of Jesus to Christmas.

A Christmas Goodnight by Nola Buck – A little boy says good-night to his nativity on Christmas Eve.

The First Noel illustrated by Jody Wheeler – Watercolor paintings put to the words to the carol “The First Noel.”

Christmas Angels by Gwen Ellis – Tells how angels were involved in the Christmas story.

Mary’s First Christmas by Walter Wangerin Jr – A different way of telling the story, this is written from the viewpoint of Mary talking to Jesus about his birth when he is a boy. Undertones of what will happen to Jesus find their way into the story; some Amazon reviewers didn’t like that it is a little dark in places.

The Story of Christmas by Pamela Dalton – Yes, it’s one last Nativity storybook. But this one uses the words straight from the KJV alongside incredible papercutting illustrations. How gorgeous!

So there you have it! Twenty-five books you can wrap up and stick under the tree. Each day in December, let your children pick one to open and read together. There will be a lot of repetition, which will help the True Story of Christmas really stick in their little hearts.

What’s your favorite Jesus-Centered Christmas book?

We Wish You the Merriest!

FamilyChristmas

From our family to yours, we wish you the merriest of Christmases as we celebrate the birth of our Savior, and a wonderful 2012.

Writings of Christmas Past:

Ten Favorite Christmas Albums
The Christmas Enchantment
Mommy’s First Chistmas Miniseries
It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas on TV

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He Sets the Lonely in Families

I’d love if you’d hop over to ParentLife Online today and check out my latest original post there. It’s about remembering the lonely during the holidays … and my experiences with that.

My family moved to Richmond, Virginia, when I was 8 years old – quite far away from where my parents grew up and where all of our extended family lived. Dayton, Ohio, was a LONG trek now, and with two little kids my parents decided we’d go for Thanksgiving OR Christmas.

One of those first Christmases we were in Virginia alone, I remember a strange guest around our Christmas tree: my dad’s work friend, who had recently had a broken engagement and was suffering heartbreak. … read more.
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The Easiest Christmas Decoration Ever

SNV31315

You know me, right? (And if you don’t, hey, subscribe! I’m strange but endearing.) I am disorganized. A mess. And I don’t really craft. Any craft I do with Libbie is either from Pinterest or laid out explicitly for me a la Truth in the Tinsel.

But I volunteered to host a table at our annual ladies’ Christmas dinner at church. And that requires decorating a table. It may seem out-of-character, but I do like to do tablescapes. Back in the day, before kids, I loved making little centerpieces for our formal dining-room table.

On Tuesday I put together my table decorations and realized my crystal candlesticks were still packed away with my china somewhere. I wasn’t about to dig through six or eight boxes in hopes of finding them. So I decided to put together a makeshift taper-holder from what I had.

Here’s what you need:

  • small Mason jar (8 oz.) or other small jar (I save glass jars and put EVERYTHING in them!)
  • ribbon or cord of some kind
  • rice or epsom salts
  • glitter
  • taper candle

Pour rice or epsom salts into jar so it is about two-thirds full. Sprinkle in some glitter and mix it around until even throughout. (I just used the candle to mix. Because I’m that kind of girl.)

Break off the bottom fourth of the candle and then push it into the rice/salt.

Tie a seasonal ribbon or cord around the top of the jar.

Tada! It’s three minutes later, you’re done, and you have done your crafty thing for the year.

SNV31314

I loved how my table turned out, and these little Mason-jarred candles were the perfect final touch.

Added to Works for Me Wednesday at We Are THAT Family and Show Me How at It’s a Blog Party.

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Christmas Baking

See, I have this problem.

I have this little sister Lola.

Oh wait, maybe I’ve read this book a few too many times in the past week. Ahem. Let me start over.

I have this problem. I REALLY love to bake. You might not think that’s a problem, but it is. Because I am afraid it might turn me into a 600-pound woman who can’t get through her front door.

Thankfully, I have a whole dorm of high-school boys that I send baked goods down to at least once a week. It’s an excellent way to try out recipes.

With all the Christmas decorations coming out, I am just itching to bake. I’m taking suggestions in the comment sections on what I should make (and home addresses, for shipping?!). Here are ten ideas from my readers or recipes that I love!

Hello Dolly bars



Chocolate Chip Almond Cookie Bars

 

Oreo Truffles

 

Pumpkin Cookies

 

Peanut-Butter Ball Cupcakes with PB Cream Cheese Frosting

 

Buckeyes (these are slightly nontraditional, but don’t they look ah-mah-zing?)

 

Andes Mint Cookies

 

Christmas Bark (AKA Saltine Candy or Christmas Crack … Cannot. Stop. Eating.)

 

Eggnog Cookies

 

White Chocolate Cherry Chunkies



Do you have a holiday baking list? Or do you break-and-bake or not at all?

Added to Top Ten Tuesday at OhAmanda.

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Truth in the Tinsel; Or, How Other People Plan My Crafts for Me


It’s both a relief and panic-inducing to me that Libbie is finally old enough to do craft-type things. I longed for her to be able to color, glue, and maybe even cut. And now that she can, I try to take advantage of it!

I’m not a crafty person myself, but thankfully I live in the era of Pinterest. We’ve done several creative things from there recently, including cloud dough and toilet-paper-roll turkeys!

I’m thankful to continue letting others plan my craft projects, and in December we’re undertaking a big one: learning about the nativity story by making an ornament every day.

Amanda (of OhAmanda and Impress Your Kids) is my oldest blogging friend. Her passion for teaching her children about Christ never fails to amaze me. And this year she’s put all her crafty energy and passion into Truth in the Tinsel: An Advent Experience for Little Hands.

I was thrilled to see how thorough each day’s experience is: Amanda provides a “clue” for the kids to discover in an advent calendar or on a paper chain, a Scripture to read together, questions to discuss, an ornament to make, and a further activity to do if you choose. There are also supply lists and recommendations for only doing selections from the 24 days of Advent.

The Truth in the Tinsel e-book is $4.99, but for Black Friday it’s $2.99! WOOHOO!

I sincerely hope you’ll take advatage of the opportunity to teach your child the importance of Christmas. I’ve read through Truth in the Tinsel and it’s so full of gospel truth, creativity, and love. I can’t wait to do it with Libbie and watch her grasp the Truth. And I’ll be sharing some of our projects on the Truth in the Tinsel Facebook page, so make sure you like it!

Yes, I will make a small affiliate fee if you buy through my link. If that bothers you, just type in TruthintheTinsel.com and buy it from there. But please DO IT! Cause this is an awesome resource.
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